Getting married in 2016 sounds probably as crazy as not being married in the 17th century. Robert and me got enganged last Christmas. To be very honest, I wasn’t sure if that was an engagement ring or just a ring till some weeks later when, during a fight about the chores, he said something like ‘why would I buy you a ring if I didn’t want to spend the rest of my life with you?’. Believe it or not, that’s romantic. For me. Getting married might be a frightening idea for some, but for me it’s the most beautiful bureaucratic process in the world. That being said, I hate bureaucracy. This is a second part of an ongoing series, find the first one about asking the big ‘Why?’ right here.
WHERE ARE WE GETTING MARRIED?
Oh well, we decided to get married in the city we’re living, in Berlin. That’s what we decided. For each and every of you it might be different. Maybe you’re dreaming of having a wedding at your family house or at a relative’s cottage. You might be planning a destination wedding or host it at your favorite restaurant. The options are endless and there is no right or wrong. Although, neither of us is from Berlin, we’ve settled in this city and we see no reason for tying the knot somewhere else. We don’t plan anything big or extreme. On top of that, we have work responsibilities that don’t allow us to frequently travel somewhere else (or to take a break for a month or so) in order to take care of the wedding details. You should do whatever suits you best – to the both of you. I’m sure that your families and friends will totally understand and respect your wishes. No matter what.
In our case, if we’re lucky with anything, that’s that we are on the same page regarding the whole thing. We happen to also work together, so there is literally no room for any misunderstandings – if we’re not honest with each other, we’re 100% screwed. We realized that from a really early point and, since then, honesty reigns in our relationship. Whenever I get asked about couple (or friendship) advice, being truthful is the first thing that comes to my mind. Breaking it down to the “we’re getting married” thingy, the best thing you can do is discussing everything with your partner and making sure to take it step by step.
Why to go way over your budget? Why to (officially) start your life together with debts?
Many people from your surrounding will probably have a word or two to say “from their experience” or, you know, simply out of love for the two of you. Always remember that the wedding is just a day, really, and not as important as your relationship. Maybe think of it as a birthday party, not of one, but of two people. The picking of the place for that celebration must suit the two of you. So should the decorations and, well, even the guests you’ll invite. Every relationship is unique in its own way. In my opinion, the place you choose to celebrate your wedding should somehow reflect your “special thing” you’re sharing. How about the place you met? Or if you share a hobby together, how about planning with it as a theme?
LET’S GO LOCATION HUNTING!
Since we’re in 2016, I don’t think it’s obligatory to go for the full traditional type of wedding. Unless that’s what you want. But I guess there’s a gazillion of other websites that can advice you better on the matter. I’d say, do what’s the least stressy for you. I hear there are people taking loans to make their dream wedding happen. Loans that they have to pay for quite some time of their happily ever after. Seriously, why? Why to go way over your budget? Why to (officially) start your life together with debts? What’s the purpose? It’s literally only for one day. I’m pretty sure that you’ll put on your 10 million dollar smile and so any expensive suit, dress or flower decoration will be outshined by your beautiful faces. Same goes for the wedding location. So start thinking out of the box, be creative. Find a location that means more than it costs!
It’s a true fact that for your days of planning, your most loyal friend will be the Google search engine. Regarding the location scouting, the problems start once you type the word “wedding”. Most of the venues featured online will be super expensive. Like devastatingly expensive. I don’t know what’s with you, but for us, having an expensive wedding sounds like an absolute luxury that’s not really that necessary. We’re at a starting point with our careers and businesses and this is where our main focus is set. We prefer to invest our money on getting our work in the right path, helping each other make their dreams come true. Once you set your priorities straight and you have that honest talk that I mentioned before, you’ll be just fine. From the other hand, if you dream of a royal standards wedding at a castle with a million rose pedals thrown after you and an orchestra playing your favorite song while you’re walking the aisle, I’d say go for it! We only live once!
Find a location that means more than it costs!
For the record, here’s a list to help you limit your options and find the perfect place. I hope it helps!
You are the ones who are getting married – not your brother, not your mother, not your sister, not your father. It is YOUR day. Deciding about the location of your wedding is one of the first steps that you need to do. Although this may come with much stress, always remember that the occasion is a happy decision that you and your significant other will make together. Talk with each other, check with your needs and wishes and everything is going to be ok. You do you, kiddos!
Featured Image by Anne Marthe Widvey (CC BY-NC 2.0)